Posts Tagged ‘Children’

Homelessness Makes Me Sick

Thursday, August 25th, 2011

It is only a few weeks before the children of Doorways go back to school. Thanks to our wonderful donors who supported our Back to School Campaign, the children will be equipped with backpacks full of college-ruled paper, three-ringed binders and an umbrella for good measure. However, even with the generosity of our community, the odds are still stacked against these children. They are far more likely to miss school because homelessness and abuse make them sick.

Children experiencing homelessness struggle to succeed in school if they are too sick to fully participate. These children are four times more likely to get sick than most middle-class kids. With a high rate of sick days, over 87% of homeless children are enrolled in school, but only 77% are able to attend regularly, according to the Department of Education.

For children experiencing domestic violence, learning at school may be the furthest thing from their minds. The effects of coming from a violent home can be traumatic and long-lasting. Meaningful relationships, be they with one’s teacher or classmates, may be difficult to form, and focusing on one’s classwork may seem inconsequential compared to the stress of returning home.

The experiences that the children of Doorways experience day in and day out are an opportunity for us to teach the community about the effects of homelessness and abuse on children. There are children in the classrooms every single day trying to find a way to break the cycle of homelessness or abuse they have been experiencing, but they cannot do it alone. Education is a great way to help break that cycle, but the solution will include all of us in the community educating ourselves. As our children go back to school in a few weeks, remind them that the person next to them in class may not be as fortunate as they are.

To support our Back to School Campaign, please, send messages along on Facebook or visit our campaign website here.

Perspective and statistics inspired by The Campaign to End Child Homelessness

Back to School Campaign

Wednesday, August 24th, 2011

The children in our programs are preparing to go Back to School and we want to give them the same resources that every child in Arlington should have.

Our good friend, Dawn, is here with a quick video to tell you about how you can get involved in the program:

(The Back to School program) helps children get supplies for their school year and allows them to experience Arlington County and all of its benefits.

Contribute just $10 and, if you could, forward that message to 10 of your friends, so that they could give $10; it would make such a difference this fall.”

~ Dawn, Arlington Mom and Doorways Supporter

Please help us raise $2,000 by the first day of school, Sept.6th.

Join the Campaign by donating $10 to support our Back to School program and spreading the word to 10 of your friends by finding us on Facebook or Twitter.

In the News: July 11th – July 15th

Monday, July 11th, 2011

Feature:

Local:

  • Several hundred thousand Virginia youngsters may lose access to healthy meals during summers. The No Kid Hungry Campaign aims to end that.

Homelessness:

Domestic Violence:

A July 4th Celebration at the Safehouse

Wednesday, July 6th, 2011

By Tani T. Lublin

It was a perfect evening; nothing went according to my plan.

The children's playroom in the Safehouse.

When I arrived at the Safehouse (with my bag full of tricks), I hinted that we would be having a backyard parade and a 4th of July birthday celebration.  The two sisters were excited about having a party and immediately began pulling the streamers and ribbons and star garlands out of my bag and set about decorating the living room and dining table with red, white & blue placemats, and hand-made “Happy 4thof July” banners.  The two girls decorated the party hats with curly red ribbon and wanted to create a “surprise” atmosphere for when the other four children arrived.   Once everyone arrived we all piled outside to play.  One girl handed out American flags to everyone along with a ribbon tied Declaration of Independence scroll.  We all decorated the back yard with blue crepe paper in the chain fence, tied paper streamers around the tree and its branches, wrapped the stair railings and one child decorated the sum of the patio furniture, while others wrapped scooters and bikes.  It was non-stop activity.   While I had hoped to talk about the 4th of July, a bit of history, and actually have a parade – the plan evaporated.  I was totally in their moment.

Time for cupcakes!  I asked one of the children if she would pass out cupcakes to everyone.  Even a couple of the Moms joined in sharing the fun with their kids.  One girl ended up with frosting all over her sweet face. The special moments of life are usually not the ones you expect them to be; they just happen all by themselves.  In that twilight space, as the sun bowed and well before the first star appeared in the night sky, the children spotted fireflies – the first of the summer.  Some of the children had never seen a firefly and, of course, we were all enchanted.  I told them they were special insects and magical little creatures to be treated gently.  For about 20-30 minutes, as the group ran and searched for and caught fireflies, I was witness to excitement and discovery, the sound of children’s laughter and chirping crickets, and the soft glow of an early summer night.  Perfect.

Doorways Staffer Featured at International Conference

Tuesday, June 7th, 2011

We are so pleased to announce that our Child Mental Health Specialist, Diana Ortiz, M.Ed, will have her work on display at the Congress of the Inter-American Society of Psychology’s latest conference.  The conference will focus on “For the People’s Health:  A Psychology Engaged with Social Transformation.”

Diana’s work is titled:
Unheard Voice of Children Exposed to Domestic Violence: Mental Health Needs, Prevalence, and Interventions

And Here is Diana, in her own words, about the conference and opportunity:

“I am really pleased about this opportunity. I am proud to be part of Doorways, and I am thrilled to share with an international community some of our goals, challenges, and what we have been implementing as effective mental health practices for children and youth and their families affected by domestic violence.

As the only child mental health specialist in our agency, I have worked part-time for our three programs for about two years [DV shelter (Safehouse), Family Home, and Home start]. Every time I start working with a new family, new stories fill my notebook and the willingness to be part of their healing process keeps me motivated to find what may be the best approach for each particular family. As an integrative therapist, I used many play-based therapy techniques, culturally responsive approaches, and family interventions. I firmly believe in being flexible and establishing a strong and trusting relationship with the child and the family, and through that relationship, facilitate healing and change. Being flexible means being able to think outside of the box, not only about what approach to take, but thinking about the time, the space, and find their own pace.

Children fill out my heart with their resilience, their tenacity, capacity to love, forgive, and create new opportunities. Providing them a safe space where they are allowed to feel the way they feel, a non-judgmental place where they can cry and laugh, be silly and express their deepest fears, be children again, and seemed to be a key part of the process. Parents and caregivers are also an important piece of this puzzle, and providing a space where they can appreciate their courage, love for their children, and ability to repair their broken pieces of their family, is what we can do to honor them. I could not be happier to be part of a team where we all work in synchrony to provide families the best resources, our professional integrity, and a helping hand.”

Diana Ortiz, M.Ed

Child Mental Heath Specialist

In the News: 5/2 – 5/6

Monday, May 2nd, 2011

Doorways has some tips to help you talk to your children about homelessness.  Reports of rape increased in Arlington County while the County tries to explain the number of homelessness in Arlington.  The District of Columbia is experiencing a budget shortfall in dealing with domestic violence while renters everywhere are paying a record amount to keep the roof over their head.  And this is just some of what’s in the news . . .

Doorways Feature

Local

Domestic Violence

Homelessness

Teens Struggling in Our Wealthy and Educated Community

Monday, November 8th, 2010

As I was sitting in our Project PEACE Leadership Roundtable meeting a couple weeks ago listening to the findings of a recent study of Arlington public school students in grades 8th, 10th, and 12th grade.   I was struck by the persistent data over the years that consistently show “only 33% of males and 58% of females report having interpersonal competencies” – empathy, sensitivity and friendship skills.  And, to add to this, only 36% of males and 55% of females report having the skills to resolve conflict. 

Contrasted with the unique demographics of Arlington County where we are the 13th wealthiest county in the nation, and the most well-educated; with dual masters degree holding parents being the norm.  Although AP classes and high SAT scores are the norm among our teens, we may be overlooking in our school system, and in resources to parents, the tools and knowledge of how to promote the emotional intelligence and social skills necessary for navigating the volatile area of interpersonal relationships among teen peer groups and dating partners.

Are the emphasis on honors classes and high SAT test preparation the emphasis to the exclusion of these important life skills that may one day save their life or their friend’s, or help them stay in the healthy zone of choosing relationship partners?  We see the implications for teens and young adults when they lack the essential skills to develop and maintain healthy dating relationships in our Safehouse and on our hotline

So how do we address this? We need to incorporate positive social behaviors and attitudes into what teens are learning. Not just to avoid dating violence- but the skills they need to have healthy relationships.  This includes learning how to trust and have trust, how to communicate and listen, how to deal with the emotion of jealousy, and how to have healthy disagreements.  Arlington has invested a lot of time and money into understanding what skills our teens lack. Let’s take this information and continue to learn from it to build these assets in young people so that they can create a healthy community for themselves and those around them.

~ Linda

Male Role Models Make a Difference for Children in Shelter

Monday, November 1st, 2010

It is important to teach children from a young age, both male and female, that hitting is not acceptable in any type of relationship and that all people have a right to feel safe.  Throughout my time spent as the Children’s Services Counselor, I noticed many trends while working with and observing the children living in the Family Home.  Many children residing in the Family Home come from backgrounds where intimate partner violence (IPV)* was prevalent in their household.  Another trend I saw was fathers making empty promises to spend time with their children, affecting a child’s ability to trust.

Working in an organization that is comprised mostly of females, it appears as if intimate partner violence is only a female issue. In contrary, intimate partner violence is everyone’s issue, and more males need to take a stance against IPV.  I take this stand by working with children in shelter to overcome their trust issues and begin the healing process. 

Although children can benefit from being away from an abuser and can begin their healing process, children who are away from a father or male figure still experience a lot of loss and attachment issues.

Research shows that children of all ages can benefit in many ways from having a positive male role model.  The children residing at Doorways love to talk about their lives, have imaginary play time, do arts and crafts activities, be read to, play outside, and play sports.  Any of the children would be thrilled if some kind- hearted male role models were willing to spend some time with them, exploring their interests.  I encourage you to think about how you can help families in this situation. There are opportunities for us all.

Drew Borkovitz, Children Services Counselor

 *Intimate partner violence is a more inclusive term to describe relationships that are unhealthy and violent.  It includes domestic and dating violence.

The chance to be part of a difference

Wednesday, September 15th, 2010

Children services counselor with children at the Family Home.

At Doorways, I step out of the humdrum office realm into a world of colorful chaos that keeps me on my toes and reminds me that life can be fun and futures can be bright.  It’s easy to forget the reality of life beyond routine when you spend your days chained to a desk, motivated solely by deadlines and subjected to morning-old coffee.  This is precisely why I volunteer with Doorways: for a healthy dose of reality and a good reminder that life is out there waiting.  Sans aforementioned coffee, my full-time job is a fine job; but it doesn’t allow for much passion, energy, excitement or fun.  Rare are the days when I feel I’ve made a difference in one life, let alone in the world.  Doorways – a place where I am never just a volunteer – allows me to do just that. 

As a children’s volunteer, I laugh a lot, and I’m never bored.  After my weekly volunteer shift I have endless memories, along with some Play-Doh creations, to take with me for the rest of the week.  If variety is the spice of life, then these are my spices: dancing to music-making toys, running around outside and playing pretend.  But life needs something to make it sweet, too; and I can’t think of anything sweeter than a child excited to see you, a mom relieved to be given some time to herself and the chance to be part of the difference that Doorways is making.

~Leslie Brettschneider, Doorways Children’s Volunteer

Homeless Youth Preparing for Back to School

Tuesday, September 7th, 2010

Kids returning to the Family Home after school.

Due to circumstances outside of her control, one of my HomeStart clients will have to move within the first few weeks of the school year leaving uncertainty about where her children will be attending school this year. The children will most likely have to start at a new school where they don’t know anyone and I, with our Children’s Services staff, are working to ensure they can start at their new school on the first day. The goal is to help the family find stability and reduce the likelihood that the children will have to transfer after a few weeks once they have moved.

When I delivered the children’s back to school items, a backpack with all of the supplies and a gift card for new clothing donated by our Back to School Sponsors, it was clear that having something tangible was very reassuring for them. Each child pulled out every last item describing them to me. They oooohhhed and aaaahhhed over their backpacks, lunch bags, and water bottles as if they were priceless treasures. Their excitement grew as they organized their pencils, crayons, and notebooks, eagerly talking about the upcoming school year. The security of starting the school year well prepared will help these children to overcome some of the other uncertainties in their life right now.

Thank you to all the donors who contributed to our Back to School drive this year, we greatly appreciate your kindness. Your continued support ensures that each child in our programs (62 today!) will have what they need today on the first day and into the future as they continue towards academic success!

~Kristen Barnes, MSW, HomeStart Client Services Coordinator